Creating Memories

An Essay By Brianna // 8/20/2007

The evening was beautiful and cool. I felt very much in need of a pleasant, peaceful walk, having just been working hard in the garden weeding and picking beans and cucumbers.So I decided to go to the field and back, and maybe check for berries while I was there.
Walking leisurely to the path, I breathed in the fresh air. This would be grand. Looking down at the kittens as they followed me, I felt something sticky wrap itself around me. Startled, I drew back and found that I had run right into a very large, gigantic, sticky, thick spider web. I was covered in it. It was really disgusting. I reached my hand up, and felt something yucky, so I grabbed it, but it squished into my hair ... I tried to get as much as I could off, and then I debated whether to go on the walk still or not. After a moment or so of pondering this, I decided that I wasn't going to let it stop me from enjoying the lovely evening, so I continued (all the while with thoughts off bugs crawling around on top my head, or down my neck).
As I went along, memories of good fun times I've had with random different people at that spot came floating in, as if with the cool breeze. It was a lonely feeling, standing there as the sun began to glow orange, all alone, remembering good times gone, and feeling as if I were half re-living them, half making another memory. And I thought of the future, and the memories I would create. Would I stand in that same place, years later, and remember this as the past? Had people stood here, long long ago, remembering things themselves, and thinking about the future? In a way, I was in the future. Their future. Who would be in my future?
I climbed the 'step tree' and stood at the top of the hill for awhile, looking over where, in the past, I had grown up, and had so much fun. The simplicity of my childhood looked very inviting. Sometimes I wish I could jump into the vivid pictures of my memory, and just live in that security of being a child.
Then, the feelings getting a little too sad and depressing, I burst into the sunny warm field. The contrast between it and the damp cool woods was shocking. My eyes scanned the line of trees far on the other side. It was lovely to look upon it. I found some berries after some careful looking, and picked them. After I got pricked and torn countless times, I triumphantly held onto the big juicy berries in my hands. They would be good for a pie. Looking down, I realized I had just been standing in a large patch of poison ivy. --Fortunately I've never gotten it bad yet, so I thought I might be spared, even considering the fact that I had shorts on, and flip-flops ... (don't ask me why I went walking in flip-flops ...)
I was sort of frustrated because I hadn't really had the best of walks, and I decided I was going to go back. Besides, the mosquitoes were eating me up, and a nasty fly was not leaving me alone. So, calling to our dog, I raced her across the field. Just as I pushed myself to beat her to the edge of the woods, I saw another dog out of the corner of my eye, running after me. I came to an abrupt stop. (don't know how) and up came the dog, barking and yelping at me, getting closer and closer, and then, behind it, three more! It was a frightening prospect, being chased down by four dogs. Especially seeing as my history with dogs chasing me isn't the best. Fortunately I didn't run. One call from their owners, and the dogs just simply stood still ... I was still surrounded by them, however, and our dog, being the protective dog she is, was about to dive into a hot fight. (Brave dog! and even outnumbered by three!) I put a stop to it though, knowing now that I was safe.
The owners came over, and proceeded to talk to me about dogs and bones. They both marveled at how good their dogs were being. Their very well behaved dogs, still all around me, were sniffing me, and slobbering all over my shorts. Not to mention they were also terrorizing the kittens who were squirming and clinging to me...
Then they were gone, and I burst back into the calm, quiet, cool evening in the woods. Here I was, clutching a handful of now squished berries, the juice seeping out all over me...holding a trembling kitten on either arm, their claws tearing into my skin leaving lines of blood to bead up...spider webs all over me, dog slobber all over my shorts, and squished bugs in my hair. I'm walking back up the pleasantly shady path, and I'm wondering what in the world happened to that lovely evening walk. And though it was a great disappointment, I had to chuckle to myself as I rounded the corner of the house. I had created yet another memory that would come back to me sometime in the future ...

A year gone by, out in a pouring thunderstorm, I walked that path again. The tree we had used to climb up the hill ever since I could remember had been torn down by a tornado. The creek was swelling over it's sides, and mud swamped the path. The rushing and churning waters pounded in my ears. The rain trickled down my face, and off the ends of my hair. It was cold.
My life was still changing. My future still unknown. And I am still creating memories...

Comments

What A Beautiful Thought

"Would I stand in that same place, years later, and remember this as the past? Had people stood here, long long ago, remembering things themselves, and thinking about the future? In a way, I was in the future. Their future. Who would be in my future?"

What a beautiful thought! You've captured something I have tried to express for a very long time now. I have felt the same thing as you have on many occasions--a cornucopia of melancholic, bitter-sweet emotions that stir up a remembrance of the past and a yearning for the future.

When it comes over me, I do not know what to feel. Usually the feeling comes during a "time between times," which is the Celtic concept that something almost supernatural occurs at sunsets, sunrises, the changing of the seasons, or any other change from one natural phenomenon to another. I'll be walking out in an open field at sunset, and an overwhelming sense of peace mixed with grief and expectation for the future will come over me. I cannot pry myself away from the scene, even after the sun has long set.

I had thought it was just me, but from what you've written, I guess it's not. Great essay!

Taylor

Anonymous | Tue, 08/21/2007

I guess I share the same

I guess I share the same sentiments as Taylor regarding this piece, Briana...he expressed it tons better than I did. Your writing was so beautiful, I could see exactly what you were talking about. You brought the emotion of the piece across very clearly. Beautiful!
Thea

Heather | Tue, 08/21/2007

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
And now our hearts will beat in time/You say I am yours and you are mine...
Michelle Tumes, "There Goes My Love"

I'm glad I have found

I'm glad I have found someone else who shares the same thoughts! I had thought it was just me, too.
It's so true what you said about not knowing how to feel when it comes. It's almost like you're standing in the midst of a swirling ocean of feelings as you have before you a sky full of thoughts... memories... Very like when it's not quite morning yet, or when it's not quite night.

And you're right. It's an overwhelming sense of peace and grief and expectation for the future, making it almost impossible for you to stir from it.

Thank you for your words! :D

~Brianna

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"We have been created for greater things. Why stoop down to things that will spoil the beauty of our hearts?" ~Mother Theresa

Brianna | Tue, 08/21/2007

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"We have been created for greater things. Why stoop down to things that will spoil the beauty of our hearts?" ~Mother Theresa

Heather

Thank you for your comments on my piece. I'm grateful you enjoyed it! :)
Blessings,
~Brianna

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"We have been created for greater things. Why stoop down to things that will spoil the beauty of our hearts?" ~Mother Theresa

Brianna | Tue, 08/21/2007

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"We have been created for greater things. Why stoop down to things that will spoil the beauty of our hearts?" ~Mother Theresa

inspiration

Hi! I just wanted to let you know that your story reminded me of my own childhood and was an inspiration for my poem...

Christa | Fri, 08/24/2007

Wonderful

Even though you were making the memory I was right there with you seeing what you saw and smelling what you smelled etc. It was just beautiful. You are a wonderful writer, you have nowhere to go but up! I wrote a comment on one of your sister's essays and explained who I am.
Omie

Anonymous | Mon, 12/10/2007

I enjoyed this a lot,

I enjoyed this a lot, Brianna! Wonderful writing!

Amy | Fri, 06/20/2008