This is my place

An Essay By Bridget // 10/21/2010

ApricotPie is going to be closing in ten days now. I know most people have accepted it, but I can’t. I’m not ready to go to the ApricotPie Outpost or to ApricotTarts, no matter how thankful I am to Mary and Kassady for creating those sites. I’ve written here for about a year. I know some people say they saw this coming, but I didn’t. I never expected it to stop.
I never became a monthly writer, and I wanted to. Not for the title, but just to know I was good enough to be one. That’s not going to happen now. And actually, I’m not sure I even care. I would give it up in exchange for keeping this place.
This is being kicked out of the house before I’m 18 and have a job; being pulled out of bed in the winter time when I’m wearing summer pajamas. It’s awful.
Hannah W. said we should go out with a bang and a burst of words. These are the only words I can come up with right now.
I suppose I’m being too sentimental. Too dramatic.  That’s odd, because I never thought of myself that way. I realize we have another site. I realize that a lot of people will be joining it.
But what about the people who won’t?
What about all the stories I haven’t read yet?
I’ll get over it. Everyone gets over everything. But I don’t want to get over it. I want to love it forever.

Ben, please don’t think I’m not grateful. I am, enormously so, although this post probably doesn’t show it. I just want to have the opportunity to be thankful for a while longer. I’m not trying to make you feel bad either. I’m trying to say goodbye. I think I’m doing rather a bad job of it.
ApricotPie is without a doubt the most incredible website in the world. You did a great job on it.
In case anyone was wondering, I AM going to join the AP Outpost, and possibly ApricotTarts as well. I just haven’t done it yet due to procrastination.
This is, in part, my place, and I love it. I won’t forget it either, and all the fun times we had: Sidney the Onion, the invention of Ben the Editor Day, reading my favorite serials and going mad waiting for the next part. You guys are all incredible.
-Bridget

 

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Edit: Several days later...

Well, Ben has posted a new announcement, and I have to admit I'm as shocked as I was when I heard AP was closing.  It's good this time though.  It's not a sure thing; I realize that.  But it's hope.  I guess this might make my post irrelevant.  I'm not going to erase it though.  This was already an incredible day, and it's just been made better.

Comments

No need to erase the post.

No need to erase the post. It's a lovely essay, and pretty much sums up what I felt when I heard AP was closing, and then again what I felt when it wasn't. This is my place too, and I'm so utterly glad that you and the rest of the AP writers will all still be here.

p.s. Go ahead and try for becoming a Monthly Writer. I most certainly think you deserve it.. :)

Annabel | Wed, 11/10/2010