Queen Abigella, chapter one

Fiction By Emily // 2/11/2008

i have more tell me what you think of it!
“Is he back yet?"
The guard turned to the door, placed behind him, he saw the Queen Abigella standing in the door way with her red hair tided in a silky blue ribbon and her blue silk night gown was covered up with 3 quarter length blue silk robe.
The guard was shock to see the Queen up so late in the night. In all the days he had protected the queens when they slept he had only had one [or two people as of now] and that was so long ago he couldn't remember which one it had been.
"I'm sorry, my Highness, but our King has not returned," the guard, Zilered, replied turning back around not facing the Queen.
"I can't go to sleep and I have a big day tomorrow. It makes me quite lonely and dreadful that my husband has not returned from war, yet." She said playing with one of her red curls that hung down by her head.
"He's not really the one fighting just like a commander and chief, my queen. He'll return as always," The guard said turning his head around to face her and smiled.
"Zildred [ZIL- dreD], do you really believe that? Do you really think he's coming home?" The queen asked. "They've told me so many lies about battle I don't know what's true and what's not true. So please don't lie to me anymore!"
She brushed past him and starred at the darkened kingdom from the large windows.
"I would not lie to my Queen. And I do believe King Kaznara [Cas-naha] will return safely," He said. "I do believe in him, my lady!"
"Zildred." She sighed. "I like it when you tell me the truth."
The sun peeked in to the town only making the Derturn [Dur-turN] lake sparkle with the light.
"I must get dressed." She said turning towards him.
"As you wish my Queen" He said.
He opened her bedroom door and as she passed him she said," Thank you, Zildred."
"For what?" he answered turning his head towards his queen which made his dark brown hair.
"For the company," She smiled and disappeared into the darkness of her room.
She yawned and thought "Of course, now I'm tired!"
"You may enter," She heard Zildred say. The door opened as Abigella lit the candles all around her room and filled her bed room with light.
The doors opened and Darcy entered. Once she found her Queen she bowed and said," Did you stay up all night?"
"Zildred and I had…" Abigella thought how to phrase it for a while then just answered," We talk for a while because I can't sleep with the thought that my husband or Waligorfer's [Wall-Go-fer] king could die any second!"
"Don't even talk like that!" Darcy said opening her queen's closet and grabbing a lovely pink floor length dress.
"Well its true isn't it!?" Abigella said taking off her night gown with the help from her personal assistant.
Darcy sighed as she tied the corset on the queen.
"Ugh!" Abigella said in frustration. "It hurts!"
"I know, my gracious queen!" She smiled. Her white hair gleamed in the light of the candle.
Abigella put the dress on and her emerald green eyes sparkled as she peered at her reflection in the mirror.
"First we must go and except gifts then, we shall wait for thirty minutes until we have a court meeting and the public is invited to state problems about your kingdom, Waligorfer."
Sighing, Abigella let Darcy button her high heeled boots and they walked towards the door.
As they stepped in to the corridor Abigella said to Zildred," You may go to your quarters and sleep a spell. I'll send Hamrut [ham-root] to get Vaslang [Vah-sling] to guard for the day."
"Yes, your majesty." Zildred bowed and scurried the other way from which the queen and Darcy were walking.
"To the courtyard," Darcy said smoothing out the small wrinkles in her gray dress.
Once they arrived in the court yard she send her messenger, Hamrut to get the guard, Vaslang.
"Sit in the royal chair, Abigella," The old king [her husband, Waligorfer’s father] said as he, Fawer [faw-er], and his wife, Jedsia, sat in two silver chairs towards the back, left of the room.
"Yes sir," She smiled.
Her chair was up on a platform. The chair was made of gold and the cushions on it were of the best white fabrics.
She sat on the left hand and her husband’s empty chair sat beside her.
"Your crown," Darcy bowed and then stood up and placed it on the queen’s head.
On her head it sat below her bun and the other side of the royal gold and pearl crown rested a bit about her forehead.
"Perfect fit!" She smiled.
"We're ready when you are, my lady!" One of the guards popped his head in side from the door.
"Well then let them in one at a time!" Abigella said. She took a deep breath as he let two little girls in.
They walked down the isle and once they reached the end they bowed at the queen's feet.
"We have nothing to give," The oldest one said. She appeared to be ten and the other looked like she was five. Their clothes were torn and dirty and they looked hungry.
The five year old looked up and said," I want to be a queen someday."
"What are your names, my dears?" The queen asked with a grateful smile.
"I'm Jessi and this is my little sister, Laurien [Lorry-in]. Father died in the war and….and Mother had the flu and died." The oldest one said. "We are hungry and no one will help us that is why we bear nothing for you except praise."
"Darcy!" Abigella said turning her attention and the attention of the girls to the half crying lady.
"Yes?" Darcy asked.
"Get these girls some clean warm clothes and some food," Abigella order Darcy.
"They can sleep in my room until we find a good suitable home!"
"We did not come here for sympathy but for respect to her royalty," Jessi said looking at the queen.
"Yes, well sympathy is what you need child,” Darcy smiled.
"You can sit in the chair next to me until they bring out everything for you darlings." The queen smiled placing her hand on Jessi's head first and then she placed her hand on Laurien's.
Darcy hurried away into the direction of the kitchen to tell the cook.
"Next!" She yelled to the guard as the sister's made their selves comfortable in the large chair they wouldn't be squished with the queen sitting in it herself.
An older man walked down the isle holding a beautiful bouquet of daffodils and Black Eyed Susan's in a clear vase with water.
"Freshly picked my queen," He answered bowing like the girls in a praying position at her feet.
"How beautiful! Thank you so very much!" She smiled and tapped lightly on his shoulder with her finger tips. He hand the flowers to her and as he walked away she said," Tell the guard to bring the next in. Thank you, again!"

After receiving her gifts Darcy took the sister’s to get dressed. The queen decided to take a walk before lunch. She did not know how long she had been gone but she was finally alone in a quiet corridor much like the one that lead to her bedroom only the windows stretched from the roof to the floor. Her boots clicked and clacked on the marble floors and the afternoon sun cast Abigella’s shadow on the beautiful flowery wall paper.
“My queen?” Jessi said bowing. Her new dress with yellow and purple flowers on it swished and swayed with her every move.

Abigella jumped and the sound of somebody’s voice when she had thought she was alone.
“Please, Jessi! Call me Abby and please don’t bow!” She smiled as she pushed Jessi’s brown hair behind her shoulders.
“Sorry!” The girl commented.
“How were you supposed to know? Anyway, what were you saying?”
“I just wanted to say that Laurien I have not seen her so happy ever since three year ago when father was home and mother was healthy. So, thank you, Abby!”
Abigella smiled thankfully and asked where she had come from.
“You gave me a fright!” She laughed as they walked back towards the dining area.
“My lady, our king has return,” Gilberta said rushing down the corridor. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you!”
He sounded out of breath. A golden curl hung out from his helmet and he used his hand with unhelpful guidance from his brown eyes.
“Take her to lunch, Gilberta!” The queen ordered him. She ran off faster then ever.
When she stepped out into the town, rain fell from the dark sky.
Mud caked on her boots but she didn’t care she ran through the parade of troops and sergeants but they weren’t what she was looking.
Wagons full of them piled up then she heard…the royal trumpets.
“He’s back,” she sighed.
Riding on horseback there was the king that stole her heart.
Though he had changed a bit it was him.
“Abigella?!” he yelled.
She smiled at him. His blue eyes sparkled and she walked along with the horse.
“I’ve waited for that smile!” He grabbed her arm and pulled her behind him up onto the horse.
She squeezed him tightly like she had waited to do.
But she squeezed him too much and he lost his balance and fell in to the mud.
Abigella hopped from the horse and one of the sergeants took the horse’s reigns.
Her boot fell from her foot and she tripped over it and on to Kaznara.
They laughed as they rolled in the cold brown mud.



hi, i think the story line is fine. But I don't think that a queen not even a really nice one would have people call her by her first name unless they where her best friends or relatives. And I don't think you should've made the little girls princess's or let them sleep atleast in her room. it just makes the story sound more fake than real. maybe if she asked Tracy orsomeone to get corders ready for them to sleep in. and maybe she could make the little girls princess's later but only if neccisary (or she could make them pretend princess's in a game or something)
oh and instead of bow for the girls you could say curtseed (idk how to spell it) but it sounds nicer.
hope this helps

*happy face*

Velocity | Fri, 02/15/2008

The Truth will set you free.


It's wonderful,. maybe a little rough, but you'll get better with time.
I think you should write more.

Sarah | Fri, 02/15/2008

"Sometimes even to live is courage."

Blogging away!

thx for the comments!

Velocity: Queen Abigella was just playing around when she crowned them princesses [sorry I didn't make it clear] and I see your point on the names though I think that's how I would be. You'll see in the next chapter that with the arrival of the king the girls don't sleep in her room...there is hint for yah! :)
Sarah: Yes it's quite rough but more will come shortly! :) I’ve already wrote a few chapters in this but they’re saved in a different computer so I can’t post it at the moment or I would!


Emily | Sat, 02/16/2008


Hey, I thought you're storyline was nice, but there were several grammatical errors and run-on sentences, but otherwise it was quite nice =D

-Falling Leaves

"If life gives you lemons, throw them back!" -Joe Jonas (I think, or it might be another one of the AWESOME Jonas Brothers)

E | Fri, 10/03/2008

"You were not meant to fit into a shallow box built by someone else." -J. Raymond

Thanks! I know I need a

Thanks! I know I need a proof reader! =]

joe jonas...the reason I forget to breathe! <3

Emily | Fri, 10/03/2008


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