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giving homeschoolers and homeschool graduates a voice |
Through Confusion
Don’t know which way to turn,
I’m hung upon a stone,
A block of which way to go,
I’m walking in the rain,
My soul so sad and weak,
I need something real to cry about,
I need adventure in this life,
Is this real or am I dreaming a plain dream,
I want to make a difference,
I want to sing and shout,
I want to explore the world,
Teach, and learn,
I want to feel real pain,
I want to feel healing,
I want to feel the love, Surround me and go
right through me,
I want the sun to shine upon my back,
And the warmth to dwell in me,
I want to grab the stars with my hand,
And make a wish, that would always stand,
And take a bite out of the moon,
I’d like to fly out in the clouds,
Over oceans, and seas,
Over the highest tower,
The tallest mountain,
The longest bridge,
The dangerest beast,
I would like to be free
filed under: confusion
Ya lol Thanks.
I kinda knew there was something wrong with it but wanted to keep it..
Man, you read this piece of art, and all you can say is, "you misspelled a word"??!!?? I can't believe that. You obviously missed something. Reread the poem.
Velocity, this is incredible. I am blown away. It expresses so much. You capture the feelings of youth, same as I felt (and still feel) them. I love how you said you wanted to take a bite out of the moon. How original. How free of cliche. That expression will probably stay with me the rest of my life, it surprised me so much. I have never heard of such a thing, yet it is so right on. Man, I wish I could write like this. So uninhibited. You make it look so easy.
It doesn't matter that you misspelled a word. I do it all the time. What's important is that you expressed what you felt. Save the spell check for later, and only let that stupid, computerized grammarian criticize your spelling if you want to share what you wrote with other people.
Great job! Now get to writing some more.
Taylor
Wow thanks, I don't really know why but in poems I like expressing how either I feel or other people, and put them together.(but this poem isn't so much about me.)
I'm glad that I can write something good! :)
Thx
Velocity
*happy face*
Wow thanks, I don't really know why but in poems I like expressing how either I feel or other people, and put them together
I'm glad that I can write something good! :)
Thx
Velocity
*happy face*
This is really great Velocity! It made me feel like I could actually go and do all those things =] I've tried writing poetry like this but I can never finish it because I can't seem to figure out what exactly it is that I want.
(And I didn't even notice the missplessed word til it was pointed out)
Great job!
Thx again! ya my older sister is a VERY GOOD WRITER!! (maybe i get it from her) and singer.... and drawer... and use to paint... and um use to quilt and crochet blankets... and loves music... and um is very wierd... and fun... and shes not like a quiet person! :)
Okay that was random of me... I all the sudden just started talking about her LOL
*happy face*
Wow, this was interesting. ^^ I liked it.
One thing I would like to say, and I hope you don't mind, is here:
The dangerest beast,
There is no such word as dangerest. It ought to be 'most dangerous'.
Other than that I really like it! :)
~*~
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.