Confidence is Key

Submitted by Damaris Ann on Sat, 05/16/2015 - 01:55

I don't know about you but I am a rather timid person when it comes to public relations. I get sweaty-shaky nervous when I go through the checkout line, and can barely make eye contact with the cashier. I purposefully avoid chatty cashiers, especially the chatty male cashiers.
Groups of people are a nightmare to me, especially if we're in a place with music playing and other conversations going on. I do better with one-on-one conversations but get so nervous if I have to be alone in a car with one person. I just don't know what to say! Making eye contact and smiling is rough for me during conversations, and it always has been.
So recently I started the habit of whispering "confidence is key" to myself before going to the store, to church, to my friend's house, to parties, to weddings, and other public gatherings, but the problem with saying that to myself is that when I said "confidence is key" I was thinking, "you're pretty, you're smart, and you can do this." What's wrong with being pretty, smart, and capable? Nothing! But that shouldn't be our main focus. Our main focus in everything should be Christ.
I still whisper "confidence is key" to myself before going places, but my thought behind it is this; "you're pretty because you are just what God made you to be, you're smart because You are filled with the knowledge that God has given to you, and you are capable because God gives you His strength." So go and be confident in the self that is Christ-filled, and know that you can have the deepest confidence when you are covered by His blood.

Author's age when written

this is something that I have struggled with for many, many years, and I felt like I should put together my thoughts on the subject, hoping that some of you would be encouraged by it.


Nice! I'm glad that you have found something that makes you feel confident. I have always been very social and never had a confidence problem, but I've had close friends in the past who really struggled with this. Also, happy belated birthday. :)

"You were not meant to fit into a shallow box built by someone else." -J. Raymond

Thanks Erin!
I used to be very out-going, an extrovert of the extroverts. But right about when I hit thirteen I started having more serious thoughts and the other girls were still mostly talking about (what I call) fluff. I love theology, and the study of it. I love discussing it and listening to discussions of it, so I started sitting with the men at church so I could listen to them, and every once in a while a gave my opinion. So I basically trained myself to keep most of my thoughts to myself.
All that to say, I'm on a learning road. :)
Thanks for the birthday wishes!

I don’t thrive off of chaos: chaos thrives off of me.

What you've said is very true. A small reminder to yourself in whatever way, walking into a new situation, can make a huge difference. For me, albeit a bit materialistic, clothes and hair and whatnot make a big difference. I notice if I'm out and my hair is crazy (admittedly, it spends most of its time being crazy--just the way it is), I feel a lot more unsure and am constantly fixing it. But if my hair has been fixed, I'm wearing an outfit I like, etc, I can pretty much walk into anything and feel okay. I lean more toward the outgoing side, but when it comes to things I've never tried before, I can be more introverted, so I feel you! Thanks for sharing this, and best of luck to you! :)

Hey Damari! I wish the best of luck in this. As a very confident person, I don't so much identify with this. If we backtrack just a few years though, this was me in a nutshell. I guess it's growing confident with yourself, and also who you are in Christ. :)

Goodbye? Oh no, please. Can’t we just go back to page one and start all over again?” – Winnie The Pooh

It's crazy how much has changed in the last 2 and 1/2 years. :D Im an introvert now; love grocery shopping and making new friends. Ahhhh God is good.

I don’t thrive off of chaos: chaos thrives off of me.